3.25.2008

Real Housewife of New York

Anyone watch the Real Housewives of New York City on Bravo? It's mind numbing but good. I know, I know, I am not supposed to be watching T.V. (because I said I don't watch T.V.). I only watch three shows: Top Chef, Real Housewives of New York City, and Project Runway. And guess what? They're all on Bravo.

So, anyway, I think I am sometimes like Alex, the pretentious mom who lives in Cobble Hill.

She and her husband named their son Fran├žois, for godsakes. And their other kid? Johann.

Like that Bach dude.

Of course, Alex is from Kansas. The hubby is Australian.

On tonight's show, Alex said something to one of the other housewives over martinis that sounded like something I might say and not realize I sounded soo puffery-like: "Well, we do this thing where we taught our son to sing 'Twinkle Twinkle Little Star' in Latin. And oh yeah, we taught him it in French, too."

Alex also insists that the au pair is teaching the kids French.

The funny thing is that as much as Alex's au pair tries to teach the kids French, the au pair's job is to *take care* of the kids, and maybe have a little life herself, too, while in New York. Alex's kids don't want to speak French. Also: Alex and the hubby are not reinforcing the French so much on their kids in their critical tender young age-- so the struggle that the au pair has is pretty transparent.

Then, over martinis, Alex says she *speaks Italian* to the Countess LuAnn who appears on the show. I have met people who say they speak a language...but have very minimal knowledge in a language (but perhaps are so excited, they tell everyone they know that they speak it, anyway).

Anyway, the Countess actually spoke Italian to Alex. So Alex's attempt at Italian sort of... fell short. But, I give Alex props: she laughed off her shortcomings.

Scene cuts to Alex and her husband who assert meeting people like LuAnn will help them move into "higher and higher circles" in New York society.

Sigh.

These things are good to watch. They are a reality check for me. And they make me wonder if I am trying too hard with Alex's schedule next year. He is taking lessons in two instruments. He rows. He is learning Mandarin ... takes French on Saturdays. Is applying to the school Arts Concentration Program and may drop his science scholarship completely.

He cannot be everything. I am wondering if I set him up for frustration?

My kid needs a major break from this nonsense. It's competition for competition's sake.

Sometimes I wish he were just home...like the "old days" when we homeschooled. When he actually had time to read literature for himself because he wanted to.

I plan to visit A this weekend...and just be with him. Just enjoy what he has to tell me about his life.

Of course, I will bring my voodoo dolly of the ex-roommate and dip it in chicken blood before I go visit A.

Just kidding, people.

9 comments:

liz said...

I'm watching that! it's a riot.

Half of them sound like Judy Holliday in "Born Yesterday." No, wait, I'm dating myself. They sound like Fran Drescher in that Nanny show! all that money and none for diction lessons.

The competition between the blonde who buys and sells fashion closeouts and that other blonde (who ran out of the fashion show when she wasn't seated in the front row) is quite amusing.

New York High Society turns out to be a bunch of schmattah vendors from the Lower East Side! Who knew??

(not that I have anything against Zarin's -- I've bought all my upholstery fabric there)

And that "countess" -- she's from someplace in the US, and happened to become a model and snagged herself that Count (much older than she). I loved when she wore her diamonds to the LES club.

And the undercurrent of anti-Semitism (as a measure of class -- the midwestern WASP climbers vs. the nouveau Lawn-Gyland climbers) is pretty amusing.

my god, The Zarin woman's mutha who came up from Florida for the Jewish holidays with that unbelievable immovable facelift!

It's, more than anything else, an incredible editing job (as all those (fantastic) Bravo reality shows are).

I just feel sorry for the poor kids caught in all of this.

As far as A's activities -- is he enjoying himself? is the pressure internal, or external? sounds as if he's a kid with a lot of interests. Who will tell you the truth about what he wants.

Becky said...

Have a wonderful, I hope relaxing (for the both of you), visit with A.

Have never seen the show (we get only two TV channels and neither is cable). But I love Judy Holliday :)

la Maitresse said...

Okay, Liz, I really am with you on the diction! (Does anyone do diction lessons anymore?)

We may think (here in America) that our diction may not give away our social class. But RHONY proves that assumption to be wrong!

And looking at Jill Zarin's mutha's facelift made me feel paralyzed!

I do like Jill, though.

liz said...

I like her too.

She's very ---- haimisch.

Anonymous said...

Alex used to be a man, that's why her metrosexual husband simply adores her.

Anonymous said...

Yes, I totally agree that Alex or HORSEFACE as I like to call her is definitely a he-she.

he/she is a pretentious bitch who is entirely TOO excited about networking and meeting "valuable contacts" to come off as actual "high class" herself.

BTW, my kids are going to beat up her kids. Francois?? They've marked their kids for life.

Fake ass new money...that's all it is!

la Maitresse said...

OK. Maybe Alex on RHONY looks like a tranny.

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Markus said...

Good Job! :)