and now, for something different...

...some wit from the Hamptons. Excerpt from "The Sheltered Islander" in Dan's Papers, May 7 (Mother's Day) edition:

"I expect to be given beautiful cards on Mother's Day, filled with dripping sentiments that remind me why I am not a priority in my own life. I expect to receive touching and meaningful gifts that I can treasure for years to come. I expect to be pampered all day. I expect lobsters, alive and kicking, to appear in a pot near me. I expect my lobsters to be served to me by Russell Crowe, wearing nothing but a koala. I expect that Russell will have stuffed emerald and diamond jewelry in my lobster. I expect to be stuffed that evening with the stuff dreams are made of. I also expect I'll wake up before anything really good happens in my dream..."

Russell Crowe dressed in a koala.

Thank you so much for that.