Hallloooo Dahling!

[Maitresse is running to get to BigLaw. Suddenly, a young lady wearing a ballgown, long white gloves, and tiara with oodles of cash falling off her gown approaches Maitresse]

Ball gown Billionairess: "Hallooooo dahling!"
Me: "Erm..me? Hello?"
Billionairess: "Would yoo like an invitation to our bolllllll? Dahling, it will beee fabeulousss!!!"
Me: "OK."
Billionairess: "Come to our yacht, ok, dahling? And brrrring money with you. Lots of it. You'll need it to be with ussss!"
Me: "OK!"
[man in tails and top hot appears behind ball gown lady]
Man in Top Hat: "Hello dahling!"
Me: "Hello. My, your shoes are very shiny."
Man in Top Hat: "That is because I jusssstt paid that lowly illegal immigrant shoeshine man over there to shine them!"
Billionairess: "Alriggght then...see you on our yacht! Tah tah!"

Satire will get you everywhere.

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