Napoleon

We found you on Petfinder.com this past summer and brought you home. And we have come to not like, but love you. We find that we must constantly take photos of you like this one, where you inevitably find yourself on a pile of books when you pose. You are our biblio-pose-dog.

We speak to you and make doggie commands in French. Oddly, you respond.

You always bring shoes to me and A as if to gift us with them, then quickly pull away if we reach for them. You know how to tease us humans and make us the butt of your joke.

You like to play tug-of-war with our pillows.

You eat bananas.

And salad. And tomatoes.

You lick my hands if I put lotion on.

You stole the super hot spices off the table from our East Indian dinner once, thinking they were food. I spared you the agony of being burned by Madras sauce.

We laugh a lot with you.

You live in a part of New York City where there is much dog-o-phobia. We cannot help the dog-o-phobes, except to let them meet you. Last week, two very frightened girls approached me and asked if you would bite them. I said, "No, not unless you are a lamb and pasta dinner." They gave you a treat. They asked you to sit. You did. They hi-fived you. You hi-fived them back. They giggled and said, "He's so cool!"

Today, Alexander and I meant to take you on a walk to the dog park to get some sunshine. We expected to spend the afternoon meeting that Afghan hound, or smelling the blooms in the park. Instead, a pitbull and another dog rushed out of someone's yard, without collars or leashes, focused on you, and only on you. Not on me or A, but on you. As soon as we saw them, we knew they did not intend to meet and greet and play.

I don't think we ever could have fought so hard against a couple unleashed vicious dogs as we did. After examining your wounds, your vet thinks we were nuts. Indeed, in retrospect, I think so, too. But we don't care. Had it been us on the receiving end of an attack, you would have done the same.

Rest up, puppy. We expect to be teased again with shoes and other paraphernalia very soon.