Gimme. Shelter.

Yesterday I volunteered for photo day at A's day school. Can you say the most obnoxious, vain, inconsiderate, smartas&h middle-schoolers ever?

And it's supposed to be the best school district in NY. Ech.

I had envisioned assisting students who would be quietly waiting for their photo-taking opportunity, if anything, discussing the latest social happenings or their academic angst. No. There are clear definitions between the nerds, soshes, punks and dorks. The foreign kids who cluster don't seem to fit in anywhere. Combs thrown around. "Samantha, could you stand next to me, right here, so that nerd won't come near me?" She sticks her nose in the air. A small group of Japanese girls quietly chatter amongst themselves. Girl who just asked Samantha for the nerd protectiion flips her hair down by bending over, butt in air, as she primps that way, in really really tight jeans. She is wearing lip gloss and Lacoste shoes. "Yeah, she's hot." Boys engage in arm wrestling. "Wizeman?" I call out. "Yeah, I'm here. So?" When students learn they have to go to 5th Period after their photo-taking, they suddenly appear lost. "Um...5th Period? Ahh....but maybe I should just check on the class before that....my teacher in that class said she needed me to do something" and then they are gone. To waste as many minutes as possible because they can, because just came back from photo-taking, and who will notice, anyway?

Student status is expressed by the labels on their clothes. Like: Stanford. Nike. Yale. East Hampton. Cornell. (Canadian) Roots.

The pretentiousness really bugged me. The school is not in the City, and the kids with pink and blue hair are not doing pink and blue hair to necessarily express themselves or look chic. The pink and blue hair kids in A's school have issues. They are clearly Different. I sensed more "demarcation" from them.

Even the Canadian flag Roots girl looked annoyed.

This. is. socialization.

Maitresse action plan: Reassessment of the current school situation.

After a mini-interview asking (begging) A if he'd consider homeschooling full-time again, we agreed we're already "in it" in this and will stick it out a bit longer.
While everything feels so foreign right now, our classical home afterschooling is still functioning.

There's more. Someone plunged from the 48th floor carpeted stairwell to his death at BigLaw this week. As soon as the carpet was cleaned up a few short hours later, it was business as usual. How is Maitresse feeling? Odd. Out of sorts.

Gimme. Shelter.

AND.... I have been missing the familiar in other ways. Like Miami. "You from Miami, Maitresse? What the heck you doin' here?" If anything, I do want to get out of this "place" - geographically, if necessary. I am considering that Oxford acceptance more seriously. Otherwise, I expect a call from Morpheus via a conveniently-delivered FedEx package, telling me to just stand out on the ledge, that Trinity will be waiting on her bike downstairs, and it'll be all over.


L said...

Sheesh. The horrible kids, the callous environment, the debates, the approach of winter...no wonder, huh?

You need some salsa and sunshine in your life.

I was sitting here today thinking how much fun it would be to go house hunting in the damaged historic district, vulture that I am, and then it hit me -- I don't want to be here. Even if I found a great old house for a song. I just don't want to be here anymore. Everytime our decision to turn ex-pat wanes, I just take a good, hard look around.

What does A think of his peers?

What do you consider THE essential Salsa album? Best anthology?


la Maitresse said...

Thanks for the Cheers...

A has made a couple of close friends, and doesn't notice the static on the radar.

And true, while in Florida, I had wanderlust there, too.

I like classical salsa, and you're always safe with Celia Cruz ("La Negra Tiene Tumbao" is an album that won a Grammy, I think). Buena Vista Social Club is another classic, very popular in Europe, as well.

Anonymous said...

On the suicide: Oh my Lord!

Have been through a similar suicide experience at "BigTeachingHospital" where "BigHospitalExec" jumped from the roof and landed in front of the main entrance or the CHILDREN'S HOSPITAL - and in front of a bus load of loyal employees and parent visitors.

Sorry, but like 9/11 pictures of jumpers, the horror just doesn't lessen - you can tuck it away for long durations of time, but it surfaces now and then as it did for me today. I hope you can tuck the memory away for a long time.

I hope "BigLaw" sent out the persona grata counseling phone number for those that needed to chat about the happenings of the day, and/or questions on Miami, England (and hmmm...maybe some insight on a Trinity pre-quel or yet another sequel). Speaking for myself, (and probably many others,) I'm (we're) clearly getting your vibes of angst. It's hard for me to come up with words to make an immediate difference. I, and many others, are reading along and wishing the best for you.

la Maitresse said...

I didn't realize how angst-laden that post was until, well, now. Persona grata for counseling was provided, but I was not here when the person jumped, which is why I opted not to participate in counseling. I don't know what bothered me most: my own acknowledgement of the chronic stressors at BigLaw, or the "let's keep a good face" quick clean-up of an acutely stressful incident. Or both.